I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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