lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
you would pick up someone in the library
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
