Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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