In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
