You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
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She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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