you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Randomize