I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
