she takes plan B like it's going out of style
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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