she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Damn victory sex feels great
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
