Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
send nudes
from the living room?
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
