office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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