Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
