even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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