There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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