He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
