I hope mine doesn't look like that
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
