I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
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