he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
