I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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