Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it glows. i had to have it.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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