on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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