these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
thus making me awesome and them whores
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
