I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
