i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
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