i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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