Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Randomize
