All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
