the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
