You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I have peed in a lot of sinks
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
