If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'm sobbing to NWA
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
