dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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