remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
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