Betty ford says i'm here all night
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
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