Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode