**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I have fence marks all over my body
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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