yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
