Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
