What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
