Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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