So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize