I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
