Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
