Acid is not a monday night drug
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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