So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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