I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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