So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
