I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
the day after is always just damage control
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
