her vagina looked like bernie madoff
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it glows. i had to have it.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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