question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Randomize
