i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
